FAQs

Now that the news of our pregnancy and the identity of our carrier are out in the open, I thought this would be a good opportunity to answer some of the most asked questions Eric and I have gotten. I'll be addressing what seem to be the five most popular questions but feel free to continue asking more as they come to you! Lots of people have asked these same questions and believe me, none of them are silly questions! A couple of them are questions we had ourselves! Anyway, here goes!

Did you know it was going to be twins? 

The short answer is, yes. After a lot of discussion and education Eric and I, along with Laura and her family, decided to transfer two embryos. There was a chance that only one, or neither for that matter, would take. However, a healthy uterus and strong embryos gave us twins! So we realized the possibility of twins was high but we had no way of knowing for certain we would have twins. But it wasn't a total shock at all! 

Will the twins be identical?

Nope! Two seperately embryos were implanted so they will definitely be fraternal! This eases my mind, I was worried about the chance of mixing them up! 

Is your carrier a close friend?

Prior to us beginning this process, Laura and I were friendly coworkers, not much more than that. Throughout this process we have developed a genuine and strong friendship. We are in contact daily, either by phone or text, and I hope as well as expect for our friendship to continue and thrive. My husband and I really enjoy spending time with Laura and Rob and get together as much as we can! It doesn't hurt that they love the same NFL team as Eric! 

Are you finding out the genders?

Absolutely! We had an ultrasound last week where each baby was evaluated fully and both of the babies were fully cooperative. We are having a gender reveal party in a couple weeks so we still won't know until then, the suspense is nearly killing me! 

Are you excited?

Yes. And terrified. But mostly excited!! I think we will benefit from having twins as our first children, we don't know any different! The lack of sleep is daunting to me and all the equipment you need is overwhelming. Our sweet little home seems to be getting smaller as the due date creeps closer! But I'm lucky enough to have a loving husband and an extremely supportive family that we can lean on when we need to. 

Hope this answered some questions for everybody. Like I said, let us know if any other questions come to you, we're happy to do the best we can to answer them. Thanks, as always, for your support!  

Ours Buns, Her Oven

Sixteen weeks! We are sixteen weeks into our pregnancy! Four months! According to Google, that means the twins are the size of avocados now! Sometimes I really can't believe this is actually happening.

Sixteen weeks seems like the right time to introduce all of you to our amazing carrier. A lot of you have already had the pleasure of meeting her but for those of you who haven't, let me tell you a little bit about this wonderful woman. 

Laura is a mother of two girls married to her husband, Rob, of almost ten years. Before joining our journey she and I were not close friends but have been fortunate enough that our families have become family. She's never been a carrier for anyone before but she saw our need and selflessly offered to help us and her husband has shown unwavering support for her decision. Her two girls seem to understand what's going on, as much as a four- and eight-year-old can, and have been very loving to both Eric and I, as well as the belly!
Prior to finding our carrier, I always thought I would feel more conflicted if she was someone I saw frequently, that I would maybe feel jealous or bitter. I thought I would be more comfortable with someone I didn't have to see grow and bond with our children. Now that I'm in a situation where my carrier is someone I talk to daily and see several times a month, I wouldn't want it any other way. It certainly has bittersweet moments but it's definitely more sweet than bitter and I would probably feel a lot more anxiety about the situation if I was completely separated from the woman carrying our babies.
Eric and I hope to continuing build our friendships with our carrier and her family. Our intention is to have them as much a part of the twins (twins!!) lives as they are comfortable with. I can't imagine going through all of this with someone and then never seeing them again, or having them never see the babies again. Luckily, I don't think that is what any of us wants.
We recently went camping with Laura and Rob and their girls along with my sister and brother-in-law. If anything will tell you whether or not you get along with someone, living in a camper for a long weekend will! Fortunately the weekend was filled with good times, and lots of belly rubs!
Thank you all, as always, for your continued love and support throughout this experience. I'm looking forward to sharing many more stories with you all!
 

Party of Four

Hello Friends! It's been a long time since I've written a blog and I apologize for the lapse. A lot has gone on in our journey and we were waiting for the right time to share with all of you that all of our struggle and prayers have paid off. Our family of two will grow to a family of four early next year via our gestational carrier, Eric and I are expecting TWINS!!!
We have made it safely through our first trimester and are beyond thrilled to be able to share it with all of you amazing people who have been there with support, encouragement and love throughout this long and emotional journey.
I look forward to telling you all more about it and about our beautiful carrier and her amazing family. More to come very soon!
Thank you again so much for all of your support, it has helped Eric and I through the tough times of this experience and keep in perspective that everything we go through is worth it.

Hey, Soul Sister

Closer and closer we approach our ultimate goal on our journey to parenthood! Eric and I have our gestational carrier, she and her husband are very graciously on board to help us bring Baby Saint home and have blessed us with their sacrifice and the gift of carrying Baby Saint.
If only it was as easy as, we found her, let's get her pregnant! But, unfortunately, it's not that easy. Although, ultimately "unfortunately" probably isn't the right word. We had to complete several different steps, both together and separately, to be certain that everyone is on the same page and that we are all mentally and emotionally as prepared as we can be.
One of those steps was completed today. Psychological evaluations/consultations. Eric and I met with Dr. Crone together, our carrier and her husband met with her together and today, all four of us met with her. The goal of these appointments is to make sure that we are all on the page about different issues that may or may not come up during the pregnancy. Emotional issues, medical issues, legal issues, you name it! Thankfully, we were all pretty much on the same page with almost everything. Next step, meeting with lawyers and drawing up a contract to protect everybody involved. We anticipate that to be the easiest part ;-)
I've never been someone who is skilled or comfortable with expressing her vulnerable emotions. It doesn't come naturally to me and even though my husband has helped me to improve on this, it's still an area that I struggle in. But it's important that our carrier and her husband know how much love and gratitude Eric and I have for them. It's easy for our loved ones who meet her to get excited at the idea of her carrying Baby Saint and love on her but it's important to me that the husbands not get lost in this. Our carriers husband is just as valuable and generous and amazing as she is and his support has been unwavering and humbling.
The friendship between the four of us grows every day and everyone might not agree with me, which is fine, but I believe God put me on a path that put this beautiful woman and her wonderful husband in my life. And I thank them, Eric and I both thank them, for all that they have already done and all that they are willing to do for us.
Right now we are respecting her privacy, which is my idea more than hers, so I won't name names just yet but some of you have had the pleasure of meeting her. Once our chickens have hatched, we will count them! Currently there's nothing to tell but once there is, our world will be introduced to the woman who is changing our lives and her husband who is supporting her and us every step of the way.

The Best Is Yet To Come

Hello 2016, I see you!
I'm happy to welcome the new year with a new blog post and wish you all a year filled with love and strength. I don't think resolutions are necessary and I don't think we need to focus on "New Year, New Me." Instead I have set goals and want to focus on a better me. We don't need to be new but we can always be better.
My husband and I seem to make the same goal every year of having a more fit, healthier lifestyle which is always a battle but as long as we keep trying, I'm not disappointed. We have a membership to a great gym and I have been working with an amazing trainer, in addition to my wonderful husband :-) Have to get healthy for Baby Saint! We have set a January goal for the month to be takeout free! I suggested we do something like this for each month of the year, any suggestions for future months?
Of course our ultimate goal is to have a bun in the oven. With the holidays over, I'm looking forward to taking the next steps in this journey to Baby Saint. Next up on the agenda will be our psych evaluations. There will be three of these, one with Eric and I, one with our carrier and her husband, and the final with the four of us together. I've never done anything like this and have no idea what to expect! But we gotta do what we gotta do so I'm looking forward to getting it done.
If everything goes as planned, and I send prayers up that it does, this time next year we will be so close to bringing Baby Saint home.
So Happy New Year to all my friends and family following our journey and as always, thank you for your love and support.

Overdue Update

I have been slacking with my posts guys and I am so sorry! So much has gone on and I hope I can keep it all straight for you. 

First, we got through all of the injections and medications pretty much without a hitch. I only suffered two bruises (one courtesy of my husband and another thanks to a newbie phlebotomist) and minimal mood swings. I definitely started to feel like a pin cushion because they needed us to go for blood draws every week and ultrasounds almost every time to keep track of the egg production. 

After a few weeks of medications we did go in for an egg retrieval at Baystate. I deal with IV sedation patients at my job fairly regularly and it is definitely different on the other side of things, I have a whole new appreciation for patients stress when they come in now! I've never been sedated and was very nervous about it. But the nurses and doctors were all super nice and informative (plus I told the anesthesiologist that I'm friends with his colleague so he better be on point!) and they made me feel more comfortable. The whole thing from walking in to walking out took a few hours. In addition to their typical "route of retrieval" let's call it, they had to inject a needle into my abdomen to access one of my ovaries so needless to say, I was sore for a couple days. They were able to retrieve over twenty eggs from my ovaries, which is a great result! Fertilizing the eggs took about a week and the lab called us with updates every few days. Ultimately we were able to freeze a dozen embryos so it was definitely a success!

In the midst of all the injections, we held a benefit to help us raise funds to offset the costs associated with IVF. Baby Saint Car Show was a very humbling experience, so many of our friends and family came out to show support. People donated food, raffle prizes, trophies for the car show, all of the fellas who brought their cars to be a part of the car show and our wonderful face painter who donated her time and talent. 

Some cars from the show, our trophies and our lovely face painter

Thank you to everyone who helped organize the event, thank you to everyone who helped set up and break down the room, thank you to everyone who donated raffle prizes and food, thank you to everyone who helped sell tickets, thank you to everyone who bought tickets, thank you to everyone who came to the benefit, thank you to everyone who asked if we needed anything, thank you to everyone who asked how the night went. Eric and I were and continue to be overcome with gratitude and appreciation and we will never be able to thank you enough.

Thank you to all the raffle prize donors!

Thank you to all of our cooks!

Things have slowed down but our journey is far from over. In a perfect world, Baby Saint will be here by 2017 but don't count the chickens yet! The superstitious Italian in me does not want to get excited until there is a little baby in a belly, but I'm so happy with how things have gone so far and remain positive and hopeful for the future.

As always, I thank you for your support and your love, it is more meaningful to me then I could ever express and it really makes this whole journey that much easier to navigate through.

Ready, Set, Go!

Ok guys! It's about to get real! We have officially started the IVF stage of our journey. We've been doing all of the necessary beginning steps (doctors appointments, blood work, tracking vitals, all that fun stuff) for the last few months but now it's really getting going and I am so excited!
We met with the IVF coordinating nurse, Kathy, about a week ago. She went over all the information we were curious about, and I mean ALL of it. She answered all of our questions, she told us basically what this is all going to cost (yikes!) and she gave us a calendar for our IVF medication regiment. Today we received my medications and will be starting the first stage....wait for it....tomorrow! Now, don't get too excited guys because this is still a long process. I'll be on these first medications for about a week and then will go in for a "baseline" ultrasound. After the ultrasound they will determine if and when we begin the second stage of meds and at some point in there I will be going in for labs. THEN, a week or two from that point, I will go in for an egg retrieval and from there they will be attempting to fertilize my eggs. The embryos will be frozen and in about six months, we will hopefully implant them into a carrier.

Look at all these meds!

I'm so nervous to start these medications. I barely ever like to take medicine when I have a head cold but that is certainly something that I will have to get over and quickly! We will see how it goes tomorrow night when Eric has to "stick" me....

Six months seems like forever but there is still so much more that needs to be done before we can get Baby Saint on their way to us. Both Eric and I, as well as our carrier, will need to go through psychological evaluations, we all will need to handle the legal issues associated with the experience. Speaking of legal, another thing we learned from Kathy is that in the state of Massachusetts, regardless of biology, the woman who gives birth to the child is legally the mother. WHAT! So yes, legal is necessary! She doesn't want another baby and we want ours! Our carrier will also have to undergo her own medication regiment in order to prepare her body for the implantation. So when all is said and done, six months isn't too bad. At least that's what I keep telling myself!

As always, I thank you guys for following our journey and offering your love and support. It has been so humbling and never ceases to warm my heart. Please continue to follow as we take our baby steps.